Relationship Expert Van Moody Offers Dating Advice to Scandal’s Olivia Pope

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Relationship Expert Van Moody Offers Dating Advice to Scandal’s Olivia Pope

By Van Moody

View More: http://eqsphotography.pass.us/pas-high-resolutionThursday’s winter finale of ABC’s hit drama Scandal promises “things will never be the same,” with another addictive episode with a near-lethal dose of murder, passion, intrigue, deceit, betrayal and retaliation. The show has received critical acclaim for its ripped-from-the-headlines storylines, fast-paced dialogue and dizzying interpersonal dynamics. It has earned its “crazytwistygood” hashtag. For 2-1/2 seasons, week after week, show creator Shonda Rhimes unravels tightly-woven tales that have viewers on the edge of their seats and set Twitter feeds ablaze. The cast even joins live chats with viewers on both the East and West coasts. It is a loyal, sacred relationship that provokes critical commentary on the tension between passion and principles, and the ways in which we lobby for, leverage and lose power in our own relationships.

Olivia Pope’s on-again off-again relationship with the very-married President Fitzgerald Grant has triggered debates about the relationship issues that many people face in their personal lives. Despite her keen sense of political strategy and cunning “sixth sense” about her clients’ guilt or innocence, she is the poster child for toxic relationships: clandestine trysts with both President Grant and Jake Ballard; dysfunctional Sunday dinners with her Dad (the head of the secret counterterrorism unit B613); and her cool, calculating exchanges with her Mom (a suspected terrorist), all while leading a team of miscreant Gladiators on their own self-styled crusades for justice.

While we all want to enjoy rewarding connections with others, it becomes essential to evaluate your relationships intelligently: What makes a great relationship? How do you keep a relationship great? What are the warning signs of trouble? While it’s so very easy to blame the other person in a distressed relationship, it’s far more effective to consider and assess the situation objectively and build your Relational IQ.

While I don’t suggest or propose to solve all of her problems, let’s look at the major signs that The People Factor cover mediunsuggest it is time for you to end a toxic relationship. It might be a good time to end a relationship when someone can’t:

  • Accept a change of status in status of your personal or professional life
  • Accept that you’re ready to move on – without them
  • Accept that you do not believe the myth you’ve created about your future

Because there are no neutral relationships – they either move you forward or hold you back – here are some principles to consider – based on my new book The People Factor – that I suggest Olivia Pope, our fictional fixer and so many other women and men tethered to sticky situations should do right now:

  • Be clear about her own life’s journey and what you want in your relationship(s)
  • Don’t get caught up in the blame game
  • Be clear about your goals – personally and professionally
  • Be brutally honest
  • Be open to reconciliation, while not putting yourself or the other person in a holding pattern
  • Recognize that the most valuable people in your life may not be the most visible

Relationships are an art, and most of us lack the skill and mastery to help break—or all together avoid—destructive patterns, disrespect, and deception. Far too many people also lack the ability to have productive connections with others—those that help you achieve goals, sharpen your mind, and generally uplift and enrich your life. Only by cultivating your Relational IQ –knowing which is which and how to turn the tide on those that are negative – can you then take the appropriate action. Not to be taken lightly, these actions and decisions can make the difference between a great, happy life, and one that is riddled with disappointment, failure and regret.

Field expert Van Moody is the author of The People Factor (an upcoming release by publisher Thomas Nelson) and a motivational speaker who advises on matters related to relationships as they pertain to friends, family, significant others and the workplace. He is a “People Scholar” who helps others build their “Relational IQ” to achieve success at home, in their social circles, and in business. He may be reached online at www.vanmoody.com.


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Birmingham Author, “People Scholar” Says It’s Time to Tackle Toxic Relationships

The People Factor cover mediun

Pastor Van Moody serves on the board of directors of Joel Osteen’s Champion’s Network

(DALLAS – December 3) Birmingham minister, author and motivational speaker Van Moody says this is the time of the year to find out which relationships are worth keeping, worth changing or ending.

“Relationships either lift you up or weigh you down,” said Moody, author of “THE PEOPLE FACTOR”, a new book that offers insightful advice on building great relationships and ending bad ones. “In light of this universal truth, it’s absolutely critical that you know two things: how much you need to invest in a relationship and which ones must come to an end.

Throughout the pages of “The People Factor,” (paperback, ISBN: 9781400205028, $16.99 U.S.) Moody lays out the steps to building and maintaining genuine, authentic relationships – and how to end toxic relationships.   In a flowing, engaging, attention grabbing style, he provides a beyond-the-basics guide for the critical task of evaluating our relationships intelligently and taking decisive action in kind. Take a look at this video that will give you a preview of the book, and Moody’s approach to this sensitive issue: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03F-FjsDsbY

Moody, who travels the world teaching people how to raise their relational IQ, offers a basic framework for individuals to evaluate their relationships.  As a people scholar, Moody says most people tend to avoid dealing with relationships – good and bad.  Based on his research over the years, he is available for interviews, seminars and speaking engagements to discuss any of the following topics:

  • Is helping you hurting me? How to know
  • How to have healthy relationships with unhealthy people
  • Sure-fire signs of a toxic relationship
  • Essential elements of a successful relationship
  • ‘Relationship boundaries’: why they’re needed and how to set them
  • Signs a relationship is heading south
  • Exit strategy: when and how to end an unhealthy relationship
  • 5 fundamentals of a constructive relational transition

Field expert Van Moody is an author, motivational speaker and media expert source who advises on matters related to relationships as they pertain to friends, family, significant others and the workplace. Moody is an associate trainer in Japan for EQUIP, the world’s largest and most comprehensive grassroots leadership, personal growth and development organization founded by Dr. John C. Maxwell.  He also serves on the board of directors for Joel Osteen’s Champions Network.  Moody earned a B.A. from DePauw University and has lectured in the classrooms of Harvard and Oxford Universities where he, himself, has also studied to further his quest for knowledge in business, economic and community Development.  Moody and his wife reside in Birmingham, Alabama with their two children. Learn more online at www.vanmoody.com.

To book Van Moody, you can contact Neil Foote, neil@neilfoote.com, 214.448.3765


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Make College Work For You: Commit Yourself to Success

As millions of young women return to college, Deya “Direct” Smith, a former Miss Black U.S.A., media maven, producer and author, urges them to map out their career plan, surround themselves with a “dream team” and stay focused on their goals.

Deya Direct Smith“The point is when people see you ‘doing’ your dream and doing it well, you make those doubters, those haters into believers,” says Smith, author of “Touch Yourself: 30 Ways to Boldly Live, Love and Let Go!” Smith (http://deyadirect.net) “Our days of child-like naiveté’ are gone. Nobody owes us anything. But how you present yourself – prepared and with passion – could make someone want to give you everything.

Smith says college is a time for women to “seize the opportunity to explore options for improving your life and your career.” In her direct, tough-love book, Smith intertwines lessons from her life’s journey with heartfelt advice, targeting younger women who are struggling to get their lives and careers on track. Smith takes on the most difficult subjects from the emotional rollercoaster of everyday life to relationships, finances, health, sex life and succeeding on your job.

Smith invites college women to share their thoughts about how they’re trying to achieve their dreams on her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/DeyaDirect

“There’s a tendency for women to half-step their ways through life because of unexpected setbacks,” says Smith, who used the disappointment of a divorce from her college sweetheart early in her life to fuel a successful career on Capitol Hill and now in radio as a lead producer for the nationally-syndicated Tom Joyner Morning Show (TJMS) which reaches 8 million listeners every week in more than 100 cities. “I’ve been there – divorce, car breaking down, trying to make ends meet paying bills. But you’ve got to say to yourself that you can’t waste your time on the should-haves or the what-might-have-beens, you’ve got to commit yourself to YOU – and what you want to get out of life.

Throughout her book, Smith interjects interviews she has conducted with such celebrities as Pam Grier and Alicia Keys. As Smith has travelled around the country, she says she is hearing from so many women who are eager to start a national dialogue helping women inspire each other.
For college women, “Touching Your Life, Unlocking Your Passion”, addresses everything from how to get out of bad relationships, manage your finances, network and find a job. A key part of her approach is interspersing scriptures from the Bible to emphasize key issues that tie to her core themes.

Smith is the creator and host of Girlfriend FM, a short-form video show-commentary-blog targeting female-driven hot topics on Tom Joyner TV and BlackAmericaWeb.com.

You can purchase “Touch Yourself” online at DeyaDirect.net or on Amazon.com. If you’re interested in a review copy, please contact Neil Foote, Foote Communications, LLC, neil@neilfoote.com, 214.448.3765.


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Former Miss Black USA Tells Women It’s Time to Unlock Their Passions & Overcome Their Fears

Deya “Direct” Smith, a former Miss Black U.S.A., media maven, producer and author, says it’s time for women to unlock their passions, overcome their fears and never let a man, a job or another women hold them back.

In her new book, Touch Yourself: 30 Ways to Boldly Live, Love and Let Go!” Smith (http://deyadirect.net) offers a practical no-nonsense approach to everyday life, relationships, finances, health, sex life and succeeding on your job.  The book has been widely received as a fresh, enlightening, thought provoking and inspiring read.

DeyaSmith-TouchYourself-BookCover The book is especially targeting younger women who are struggling to get their lives and careers  on track.

“It’s time for women to take a deep look within themselves – what I call ‘innercourse’ – and for them to live fully, boldly, without guilt, shame, or apologies,” says Smith. “It’s time for us to remember that we have the right to make up the rules of our own life.  We get to live life on our terms, not the ones someone else has created.”

Smith speaks from her heart, writing about her own experiences as a young woman who falls in love with her college sweetheart, only to find herself lost in an unhealthy relationship with a man who had more problems than she ever wanted to acknowledge.  Smith interjects interviews she has conducted with such celebrities as Pam Grier and Alicia Keys.  This book, Smith says, is the start of a national dialogue that is tied to her desire to inspire women of all ages.

Smith addresses everything from how to get out of bad relationships, managing your finances, networking and finding a job. Along with straightforward advice, Smith interjects relevant scriptures from the Bible to emphasize key themes that tie to her core theme of “Touching Your Life, Unlocking Your Passion”.

“Are you ready for a fresh start? What do you need to cut out of your life so that you can begin again, get free, be light and limber?” Smith writes in Chapter 24. “Letting go of something, be it hair, a relationship or a job, does not have to be a negative. Sometimes you just need a change, something new, fun, exciting and different. Unfortunately, change is difficult for some people. And when it’s time for a change and you’re afraid to move forward, you drag your feet, and waste time.”

Smith is a lead producer for the nationally-syndicated Tom Joyner Morning Show (TJMS) which reaches 8 million listeners every week in more than 100 cities. She is also the creator and host of Girlfriend FM, a short-form video show-commentary-blog targeting female-driven hot topics on Tom Joyner TV and BlackAmericaweb.com.

You can purchase “Touch Yourself” online at DeyaDirect.net or on Amazon.com.  If you’re interested in a review copy, please contact Neil Foote, Foote Communications, LLC, neil@neilfoote.com, 214.448.3765.


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Dallas Author Writes Powerful Novel on Immigration

Dallas author Jacintha Griffith has written a compelling novel that captures the pain, frustration and disappointment of immigration for a 20-year-old woman seeking to reunite with the man she loves.

Griffith’s first novel, “Coveting the Dream”, is already getting rave reviews from readers because its fictional story reflects the national debate on immigration reform.

“So many people can relate to this story,” says the McKinney, Texas resident, who is a native of Grenada, a small island in the West Indies.  “Yes, it’s fiction, but immigration has become such a nightmare for so many who want to live the American Dream. I know this book touches a nerve that resonates with everyone.”

The book, rich in detail, engaging dialogue and constant intrigue, has been getting favorable reviews from readers around the country.

“This book is a page-turner starting with the first sentence,” writes Lindsay Biel, author of Raising a Sensory Smart Child: The Definitive Handbook for Helping Your Child with Sensory Processing Issues, on Amazon.com. “I instantly cared about the main character and empathized with this smart, interesting woman as she set about coming to the US and tried to obtain legal immigrant status. Written in a style that is warm, wise, and accessible, this book opens up a window to the heart and teaches us about some of the terrible challenges illegal immigrants go through.”

In the book, Serena, a naïve 20-year-old woman from Belize, embarks on a dangerous journey to get into the U.S. to re-unite with her boyfriend, Nick.  She lands in Brooklyn and is faced with the ultimate betrayal. Devastated, but determined to create her own American Dream, she pursues several avenues to obtain the coveted green card, including a fraudulent attempt, which leads to her arrest and detention by the Immigration and Nationalization Service.  Faced with deportation, and the reality that the dream is swiftly slipping out of reach, Serena makes a desperate attempt to keep it in sight.

Griffith, a practicing pediatric occupational therapist in Dallas, says she has been working on the book for years. As the nation’s headlines filled with stories about how legislators were pushing hard to pass anti-immigration legislation, she felt that the timing for this story was just right.


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